Cross-dressing is a secret man must keep from all others, everyone. Never trues anyone with your secret. While you can find some stories on the net about how a man got caught by their wife and she was understanding and let him continue dressing, this is out of being the typical reaction of the wife or girlfriend, and most likely it will be kicked out of the house and divorce at least in the US. The people in the UK are more tolerant of cross-dressing husbands.
Guideline not to get caught. Do not take other people clothing for your playful jacking sessions. If you take panties or a bra or stockings from your wife’s, girlfriend, a female neighbor, mother, sister, sweet or other relations, sure enough, they will notice. They will notice it missing and if you are a fool and leave signs of your mischief, it will sooner than you are discovered. Be a man and buy your female clothing.
Buying your panties if that is what you are using to get your rocks off is not that difficult. Yes, if you are twelve, it might be hard to walk into a department store and browse the woman’s underwear section to find the right size, color, and type that suits you. However, if you are under eighteen and do not have a credit card and an excellent excuse to be rummaging the woman’s undies department, there is one way you might be able to buy what you need. Most large department stores have self-checkout registers. If you can walk quickly to the racks of woman undies as in Walmart and grab one or two items that you think will fit and is the right material, then you can pay cash at the self-checkout count. Go when it is not busy, and others will not be behind you, and the salesclerk is busy elsewhere, scan your items, drop them in the bag and then pay.
The salesclerk should never question any adult male buying panties or other woman clothing as for whom you are buying the things. If you are asked to smile and do not reply or if you can, say your wife’s birthday or your girlfriend one-week anniversary.
If you do not have the time, do not do the crime of cross-dressing. Most often men get caught because they expect to be alone when doing their thing. It is one thing to slip on panties and jack off while the wife is out shopping, and you are done in five or ten minutes. However, if your desire to wear panties is more involved, you will need the time to dress, do your makeup, your nails and then time to enjoy yourself. When you are married, your wife will want to know where you are every minute of the day. If you are a teenage behind the locked door of your bedroom, it will never prevent a brother or sister or parent from knocking on the door asking what you are doing in there. The bathroom can only be used for quick satisfaction.
If you are lucky to have one or two items, you use to dress then you need a place to hide them. However, no matter how good of a place you have found you run the risk of being discovered. Some of the usual places to hide your things are:
It is not uncommon for a man in his forties to revert to cross-dressing or discover cross-dressing for his enjoyment. At this time in his life, he may have more time to spend cross-dressing and more resources to cover his tracks. However, remember if you are married or have a girlfriend there is a risk of being caught. The result will be the same, you married will be over and your girlfriend will leave. If you are not willing to give up your relationship, then do not cross-dress.
The following are some rules to help you not get caught. The same rules apply for not getting caught as if you are an affair as does for not getting caught cross-dress but with a minor twist.
Plan everything. Don't leave anything to chance. It does not matter if you are dressing in private and spending a couple of hours dressed or if you have decided to meet someone, keep your plan clean and straightforward. Never write you plan on paper or keep on the computer, you must keep you plan in your head. Plan on how you will meet someone that you can trust, but remember not to give them your real name, location, where you work or any information that could be traced to you. Create a new identity. Go out and find several business cards of others, a realtor, a banker or used car salesman. When you meet someone to show them the business card, do not give. Your fake ID can use one of these names from the business cards.
Rule #3 Do not leave a paper trail, always pay cash, never use your shared credit card. If you are going to spend money on your cross-dressing, make sure not to use your joint credit card. Open an account at a different bank but remember it will show up on your credit report and if the SO has access to your credit history she will ask about the unknown card. Tell her your company required you to have one for emergencies.
If you get caught, try to minimize the damage. This means you need to have an emergency plan and an exit strategy. Don't be an idiot and not plan for a disaster. If your dressing is discovered, when asked, never admit everything. Keep the SO in the dark as much as possible; they won't be able to piece everything together, and if you are busted, they won't be able to provide a complete picture leading to your downfall. If caught be prepared to try and get your SO to accept your fetish. Do a Google Search for, “Tell your wife you’re are a cross-dresser,” and you will find over 30 hits that will give you advice on telling your SO. Have one or two of these websites handy to give to your SO should you have to admit you enjoy woman clothing. Try this site http://www.tau-chi.org/.
Rule #6 Go no go. Be on the alert that you might be being watched or that there is suspicion with your excuse to be away for a few hours. You will need to be ready to abandon your date should you feel something is not right with your plan. Set a go no go check and trust your instants as to going forward or not.
Rule #8 Remember the little things, cover your tracks.
Rule #9 Computer security.
Rule #10. Never play in your backyard. Never meet anyone that knows you or your family. Meet people at least 60-mile distance so there is no chance of being observed by someone that knows you and might report your activities to your SO.
Rule #11 Secure your conservation. Password lock your current phone to prevent the curious from seeing incoming messages. But you might be asked to see your text messages. Best to get a second phone and keep it hidden. If asked about the second phone say it belongs to the company or a friend that you are returning.
Rule #12 Use a condom. Using protection away from home will avoid bringing home an STD or getting someone pregnant (if you are bi you may find yourself with a woman) was key to keeping their affairs on the down-low. If at home. You use a condom for birth control then never use your home supply for your meeting. Buy three at a time and toss any unused condom.
Rule #13 Hide the evidence, never bring a strange smell home. Makeup or lipstick on your clothing would immediately raise suspension. Before returning home make sure you wash any smell off your body and do not replace with your own that will be stronger than what would be expected after hours of use. Take a shower before you get home, not right after. Make sure to wash off any signs of what you have been up to. Your SO will have no problem picking up the scent of another on you,
Guideline not to get caught. Do not take other people clothing for your playful jacking sessions. If you take panties or a bra or stockings from your wife’s, girlfriend, a female neighbor, mother, sister, sweet or other relations, sure enough, they will notice. They will notice it missing and if you are a fool and leave signs of your mischief, it will sooner than you are discovered. Be a man and buy your female clothing.
Buying your panties if that is what you are using to get your rocks off is not that difficult. Yes, if you are twelve, it might be hard to walk into a department store and browse the woman’s underwear section to find the right size, color, and type that suits you. However, if you are under eighteen and do not have a credit card and an excellent excuse to be rummaging the woman’s undies department, there is one way you might be able to buy what you need. Most large department stores have self-checkout registers. If you can walk quickly to the racks of woman undies as in Walmart and grab one or two items that you think will fit and is the right material, then you can pay cash at the self-checkout count. Go when it is not busy, and others will not be behind you, and the salesclerk is busy elsewhere, scan your items, drop them in the bag and then pay.
The salesclerk should never question any adult male buying panties or other woman clothing as for whom you are buying the things. If you are asked to smile and do not reply or if you can, say your wife’s birthday or your girlfriend one-week anniversary.
Once you are old enough to get a credit card in your name, then you can order online. Remember the credit card must be yours and not shared with a spouse or girlfriend, and your mailbox delivery must be as private as your cross-dressing.
If you do not have the time, do not do the crime of cross-dressing. Most often men get caught because they expect to be alone when doing their thing. It is one thing to slip on panties and jack off while the wife is out shopping, and you are done in five or ten minutes. However, if your desire to wear panties is more involved, you will need the time to dress, do your makeup, your nails and then time to enjoy yourself. When you are married, your wife will want to know where you are every minute of the day. If you are a teenage behind the locked door of your bedroom, it will never prevent a brother or sister or parent from knocking on the door asking what you are doing in there. The bathroom can only be used for quick satisfaction.
If you are lucky to have one or two items, you use to dress then you need a place to hide them. However, no matter how good of a place you have found you run the risk of being discovered. Some of the usual places to hide your things are:
• Under your bed or your mattress
• In a box in your closet
• In your car
• In the garage in a box of used clothes or a suitcase not used
• In your golf bag or bowling bag or fishing tackle box (oh the smell)
• A little harder to find is to remove the bottom drawer of your dresser and there is a space between the floor and the bottom of the drawer where you can hide a few things. If discovered claim you do not know where they came from and suggested it was the last tenant of the rental flat.
Life as a teenage crossdresser is difficult with a different set of problems. As a teenager, you have more time to yourself and if you are in the house by the time set you do not get a question about where you have been and what you have been doing. If you do, you can respond by hanging out with friends. Life as a single man has more freedom and opportunity, but your freedom will vanish as soon as the girlfriend moves in or you are married. Most men when they find a girlfriend or is married will put away their girly things. All is fine until the wife or girlfriend stops having sex and the man must resort to taking things into his hands. Most cross-dressers start off as a heterosexual male using cross-dressing as a form of masturbation.
It is not uncommon for a man in his forties to revert to cross-dressing or discover cross-dressing for his enjoyment. At this time in his life, he may have more time to spend cross-dressing and more resources to cover his tracks. However, remember if you are married or have a girlfriend there is a risk of being caught. The result will be the same, you married will be over and your girlfriend will leave. If you are not willing to give up your relationship, then do not cross-dress.
When you are married and cross-dress, the following are the possibilities if your fetish is discovered:
1) The worst will happen, you family with think you are a pervert, you neighbors will quit speaking to you, your co-workers will laugh behind your back. You will be divorce and not have custody of the children.
2) Your wife or girlfriend will think it is disgusting but for the sake of the children you will be allowed to continue to pay the bills, but you will not have sex with her again, and you will not be allowed to dress again.
3) You will understand that you have an illness, and she will work with you to go straight but sooner or later will revert to 2 or 1 above.
4) You spouse will understand, will allow you to dress but will not help or support you. Sooner later she will take the position of 3 then 2 then 1 above.
5) You will understand and support you. She will help you buy clothes, will play dress-up with you in bed; will even allow you to date men. This action is the rarity and never expect that your wife is such a woman in her individual. Remember most women is willing to share another bed.
As a cross-dresser, you can either do your thing in the closet or the open. The attitude of the public is changing, and it is possible that you can advance from a closeted CD to a full-time transvestite. Until you can go public, you will be sneaking around to find some time to dress and do your makeup. The following rules are intended for those CD that dares in the closet and wishes to stay that way but feel the need to meet someone for some bedroom fun.
The following are some rules to help you not get caught. The same rules apply for not getting caught as if you are an affair as does for not getting caught cross-dress but with a minor twist.
Rule #1 Never, Never, ever tell your Sufficient Other (SO) or family that you are a cross-dresser. If you admit that you are a cross-dresser, you run the risk of losing everything you have. SO really do not want another woman in their bed. If you do decide to tell, refer to rule #5
Rule #2 Plan, plan, pl
Plan everything. Don't leave anything to chance. It does not matter if you are dressing in private and spending a couple of hours dressed or if you have decided to meet someone, keep your plan clean and straightforward. Never write you plan on paper or keep on the computer, you must keep you plan in your head. Plan on how you will meet someone that you can trust, but remember not to give them your real name, location, where you work or any information that could be traced to you. Create a new identity. Go out and find several business cards of others, a realtor, a banker or used car salesman. When you meet someone to show them the business card, do not give. Your fake ID can use one of these names from the business cards.
If you are to meet at a hotel and you have agreed to rent the room, then pay cash, use your fake ID to register. Tell the desk clerk that you only need the room for a business meeting or that you are traveling and must catch a plan. At check-in, you will be asked for your car license plate number, give it but transpose the numbers. Hotel seldom checks what cars are parked. If you have a concern, park you’re in a shopping center and take a taxi to the hotel.
See the rules below and plan, plan, and plan.
Rule #3 Do not leave a paper trail, always pay cash, never use your shared credit card. If you are going to spend money on your cross-dressing, make sure not to use your joint credit card. Open an account at a different bank but remember it will show up on your credit report and if the SO has access to your credit history she will ask about the unknown card. Tell her your company required you to have one for emergencies.
Rule #4 Have a backup plan
If you get caught, try to minimize the damage. This means you need to have an emergency plan and an exit strategy. Don't be an idiot and not plan for a disaster. If your dressing is discovered, when asked, never admit everything. Keep the SO in the dark as much as possible; they won't be able to piece everything together, and if you are busted, they won't be able to provide a complete picture leading to your downfall. If caught be prepared to try and get your SO to accept your fetish. Do a Google Search for, “Tell your wife you’re are a cross-dresser,” and you will find over 30 hits that will give you advice on telling your SO. Have one or two of these websites handy to give to your SO should you have to admit you enjoy woman clothing. Try this site http://www.tau-chi.org/.
Go to consoling now, so if busted you can honestly say you have been trying to manage the urge. Pick a consular that support CD otherwise if she picks a marriage consular she will pick one that does not support CD.
Rule #6 Go no go. Be on the alert that you might be being watched or that there is suspicion with your excuse to be away for a few hours. You will need to be ready to abandon your date should you feel something is not right with your plan. Set a go no go check and trust your instants as to going forward or not.
Rule #7 Set up habits and do not change them
As part of your plan, set up a routine that will provide you with an excuse to be gone for a few hours or a day. Do not expect to go golfing or fishing with the guys to be an excuse to be out of the house. Your alibi will fail by a simple phone call. Once you set an alibi, do a test run several times to see if there are any questions asked by your SO. If there are suspicions, you can honestly respond that nothing is going one. Don't suddenly change behaviors or habits. The best way for you to not raise suspicion is by maintaining your same habits. If you know there will be a change, then plan slowly for that change.
Rule #8 Remember the little things, cover your tracks.
Do not use your credit card, or the office or home computer to set your time and location of your date. Do not use your phone to store any information. Delete, Delete, Delete daily all trace of your activity. If you think your car will be spotted and betray your location, then use the local bus or taxi. Have an alibi or two. Time your indiscretions to have minimal gaps in your timeline as possible.
Rule #11 Use a fake name
Make your fake ID. Templates can be downloaded from the internet. This link will help you make your fake ID.
https://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Fake-ID
Collect a few business cards of a realtor, banker or use car salesman and use one for your fake ID cards in a city when you plan to play, so you look like a local guy, not business cards from you live.
Collect a few business cards of a realtor, banker or use car salesman and use one for your fake ID cards in a city when you plan to play, so you look like a local guy, not business cards from you live.
Start a profile with TVChix www.tvchix.com. It is a free website for cross-dressers that has features for a profile, email, posting messages, chat is and posting photos. It is possible to use this site to meet someone like a fellow CD or an admirer. The site is based in the UK, but there are plenty of members in the US. If you want a US website, try https://www.clubcrossdressing.com/ or visit this site for a list of ten possible dating website. https://www.datingadvice.com/online-dating/crossdresser-dating-sites
Rule #9 Computer security.
Do not share a computer for any of your activities. Some keyloggers will record every keystroke. Your SO will learn your private email account, PW, conservations.
On your laptop delete your history, web Brower and email sent and received. Go to this website and follow their directions to stay as private as possible online. https://www.tripwire.com/state-of-security/security-awareness/hide-browsing-history-complete-guide/
Do not use the office computer. IT departments for the company have nothing better to do than observe online employee activities.
Rule #10. Never play in your backyard. Never meet anyone that knows you or your family. Meet people at least 60-mile distance so there is no chance of being observed by someone that knows you and might report your activities to your SO.
Rule #11 Secure your conservation. Password lock your current phone to prevent the curious from seeing incoming messages. But you might be asked to see your text messages. Best to get a second phone and keep it hidden. If asked about the second phone say it belongs to the company or a friend that you are returning.
Use the Blackbook app Best App for Hidden Secret Contacts on Your Phone with a password.
Never use Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter account communicate with someone you will meet. If you must communicate with someone, use WhatsApp app https://www.whatsapp.com/download/
Abandon Google browser. Consider the search engine DuckDuckGo, which has an official "no tracking" policy.
• Use a VPN. A VPN Iteral Private Network on your smartphone and laptop. A VPN provides a private tunnel to your internet allowing you to access restricted adult websites when logged on someone’s Wi-Fi that restricts adult porn sites. It also helps prevents someone from snooping your network activities.
• Go dark with TOR. For the ultimate in online protection, consider TOR, a free app designed to shield you from online surveillance.
• Turn off your webcam. Malicious users and malware can take control of your webcam and monitor you or record your every move. Disable it, disconnect it or cover it with tape.
Rule #12 Use a condom. Using protection away from home will avoid bringing home an STD or getting someone pregnant (if you are bi you may find yourself with a woman) was key to keeping their affairs on the down-low. If at home. You use a condom for birth control then never use your home supply for your meeting. Buy three at a time and toss any unused condom.
Rule #13 Hide the evidence, never bring a strange smell home. Makeup or lipstick on your clothing would immediately raise suspension. Before returning home make sure you wash any smell off your body and do not replace with your own that will be stronger than what would be expected after hours of use. Take a shower before you get home, not right after. Make sure to wash off any signs of what you have been up to. Your SO will have no problem picking up the scent of another on you,
If you meet at a hotel, make a motel where you park in front of your room, and the guest does not have to walk through the lobby.
Remember cross-dressing is your hobby, it is your fetish; it is your second personality. Cross-dressing will cost you money, a lot of money. Shoes (heels, or boots or sneakers) are $24-40 at Payless Stores (up to size 14). Dresses at Goodwill will cost $5 or skirts and blouses $5-8. A good wig will cost $25-75. You could go cheap and by one at a costume store for $10 but looks terrible after a couple of time used.
Jewelry will cost $25-50. Panties and a bra will cost $25-50. Makeup will run $100-200 unless your face is so fem that you can get by with just lipstick.
The hotel room will cost $75 to 125. Using a taxi will cost another $10-20.
You will buy software to make you're surfing the net safely and to hide anything on your hard drive. You may buy photo editing software to make your portraits lovelier. Cost for software $100-200.
Cross-dressing is an expensive hobby but that costly as golf, scuba diving or fishing.
If you cannot afford the above, then do not try to meet someone for a date. It cost money to dress; it cost money to cover your tracks, it cost money to be a cross-dresser.
